Baby Clark

i knew i was pregnant even before the test said i was on the 7th may 08
... i just felt it .. your daddy was so shocked but happy and was so excited ... xx
i even had a few names already for you !! .. infact we also bought a pram / buggy - it was as good as new and was in our local charity shop ..
having two kids already i thought of the practical side of saving money !! ... felt weird pushin the pram back from the shops - your brother wanted to push it and i imagined you in there my perfect little baby....... working out the dates you were due on the 5th January 2009 !! ..

i started having a few pains but was reassured by my doctor they were just embedding pains and everything was ok .. x it couldnt of been more further from the truth :-(

.on the 10th may 08 i woke up in serious agony and begged daddy to take me to hospital i felt each bump on the way ! ..
the doctors were going to misdiagnose me but thankfully i had a internal scan and our my worst fear was coming true .......
a ectopic pregnancy was confirmed i was in total shock and felt sick with fear ( my worst fear was to go under for a op too ) .
that evening I was taken to surgery and operated on i lost my baby and my right tube was also removed .
i still cant believe this has happened and still look down at my empty womb where my baby should still be safe inside but it is empty and broken like my heart ♥
♥now in my eyes no matter how small it was too me he/she was still my baby.♥
♥i found out i was officially pregnant on my sons 10th birthday the 7th may ..
♥♥i feel so guilty and i cant stop thinking about my poor baby ..♥♥

♥so here i am making a site to remember my baby by ... no matter how young you was to me you were my precious lil angel ..x...♥

♥mummy and daddy will NEVER forget you .. and your brother callum of course ! .. x... ♥

♥i believe there is a life after death ♥

i believe we will be reunited someday..x

untill that day comes my angel u will be forever in mummys thoughts ..

love mummy xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx♥

I grieve because you will never know
The comfort of my touch.
I grieve because you will never know
That you were loved so much.


My Mum, she tells a lot of lies
She never did before
But from now until she dies
She'll tell a whole lot more

Ask My mum how she is
And because she can't explain
She will tell a little lie
Because she can't describe the pain

Ask My Mum how she is
She'll say "I'm Alright"
If that's the truth then tell me
Why does she cry each night?

Ask My Mum how she is
She seems to cope so well
She didn’t have a choice you see
Nor the strength to yell

Ask My Mum how she is
"I'm fine. I'm well, I'm coping"
For God's sake Mum, just tell the truth
Just say your heart is broken

She'll love me all her life
I loved her all mine
But if you ask her how she is
She'll lie and say she's fine

I am here in Heaven
I cannot hug from here
If she lies to you DON'T listen
Hug her and hold her near

On the day we meet again
We'll smile and I'll be bold
I'll say, " You're lucky to get in here Mum,
With all the lies you told!"